How the new rich are spending their money and it’s not what you expect.

We tend to associate rich with materialism and the throwing around of stacks of money on fancy things.

However, that’s not what the new real rich invest in at all. It could even be questionable if they avoid it. It’s definitely not about the designer brands and flashy cars anymore.

Nowadays, it’s common for middle-income people to be able to buy designer bags and fancy new cars but the new rich show their wealth in a different more subtle way beyond just materialism.

Consider one of the youngest billionaires in the world, Mark Zuckerberg.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen him holding a LV bag, rocking a Rolex or driving a Rolls Royce.

Here are 5 ways on how the new rich live and what they’re burning their cash on – it’s probably not what you’d expect:

1. Health

The new rich are definitely investing in health.  With technological and medical advancements, there’s tons of new information on ways to lead healthier lives.

The new rich tend to take health and exercise more seriously, even going a step further by customizing their foods and exercise to their own individual bodies.

They are making use of new medical technologies going as far as being able to help you identify what your body specifically requires and attains just through your blood sample.

They are constantly finding ways of improving their quality of life through health and take their frequent medical checkups seriously.

Another aspect of health that the new rich take care of is their psychological well being.

If you were going to a therapist in the old days (and in some cases even today), the ignorant usually associate it with having clinical issues.

Nowadays, with increasing importance given to how our human psychology affects our daily lives directly, the new rich invest in their mental well-being.

It would be common for the new rich to have their therapist or coach on speed dial for rainy days where they need some uplifting.  They value being aware of their mental state and keep focus on improvements on their thoughts and subconscious.

The new rich educate themselves on the importance of having a healthy mind and take measures to keep it that way.

Your mind and body are not separate. What affects one, affects the other.”

2. Education

Continuous self-development and growth is a popular and important concept when it comes to the new rich.  It’s about the continuous growth of what you know and what you can know more.

According to a BBC Capital Story, spending on education for the new rich has increased by a significant 3.5 times over since 1996 while middle-income spending on education has stayed pretty much flat over the same amount of time.

That’s a huge difference.

When I talk about education, I’m not only referring to academia.  While the new rich understand that constantly improving education in your field of work is important, they also try to incorporate other hobbies and grow other potential talents.

They invest in their interests as well.  For example, taking a lesson at being better in golf, pursue singing, dancing or even learning to play a new instrument.

The new rich understand the importance of being a well-rounded individual and waste no time they utilizing the tools provided to improve themselves in all aspects of life and be successful at whatever they can master.

Especially with the power of the internet – education has become more accessible to everyone. You can literally do a course on just about anything from the comfort of your own home. The new rich don’t want to waste time traveling to and from classes – they rather have the information and learning at a click of a button. For this reason, we have made my Public Speaking and Presenting Masterclass available online.

Link : Online Public Speaking Masterclass

3. Retirement

Personal planning is very important for the new rich. they focus their finances on security and it shows that retirement is one of the top aspects they are investing on.  This shows that the new rich place importance on thinking ahead and envisioning a safer and securer future.

Questioning whether or not we’ll have enough funds to provide us with the kind of retirement lifestyle we want is something a lot of people tend to overlook.

For many working-class individuals, sometimes the thought of saving money and thinking about a retirement plan isn’t really in the books.

This is only up until the realization sets in that nothing lasts forever and with time, things will begin to change.

That’s when investing a portion of your salary into retirement comes to mind.

Consider that it’s better late than never.

4. Travel

It’s one of the most priceless experiences you could ever have.

Being well traveled is important for your growth as a person.  Going new places, potentially meeting new people and witnessing new culture is nothing short of an honoring experience.

With globalization becoming more and more common in our present world, traveling frequently has become one of the ways the new rich live.

To explore other parts of our world and see beyond the boundaries we have been comfortable in builds awareness.

5. Appreciating Assets

The new rich understand that sometimes you have to spend money to earn money.

One of the ways through which they do that is through investing.

Investments can be on buying a new home, properties, art, land or even buy shares in increasingly popular companies.

They secure their finances through finding other reliable sources for income that would have a high chance of appreciating in value over time.

In Conclusion

The new rich realize that investment in all these areas can noticeably impact a person’s quality of life by a landslide than someone who doesn’t do any of these.

They choose to spend their money on things in life that truly matter rather than buying things they don’t necessarily want to impress people they may not even like.

It also improves the quality of life for the next generation and is far from spending on materialistic things that eventually mean little.

The step to take action on such aspects also defines and secures a strong social standing in society even if it may not necessarily show it.

Material things lost can be found. But there is one thing that can never be found when it is lost. Life.” – Steve Jobs on his deathbed.

 

No BS Approach To Pregnancy

This is my No BS Approach To Pregnancy. I detail everything I used during my pregnancy and I am going to tell you everything you need to know about being pregnant and how to have the best experience. 

1. Vitamins 

Regardless of your diet, you have to have an element of supplements. I’ve been using the brand, Pregnacare, for over three years now. I used it during my conception and also now, breastfeeding. It has 17 different vitamins, as well as, Folic acid. You can have one a day with your breakfast in the morning and you are good to go.

2. Must Have App

The app that I used during my pregnancy is called Pregnancy Plus. It connected us to the baby, by allowing us to track the size of our baby, informing us about what was happening to my body, health and tips, partners info, and allowing access to a bunch of articles, pictures, and videos, in order to gather the best insight during pregnancy.

3.  First trimester tiredness

It is natural to feel fatigue during your first few trimesters of your pregnancy. What I did to help me push through the day, was to rest as much as possible and take naps. After my work, I would go home, and take a rest. That way, if I had more work to do, I would have more energy to do it, after taking a rest. If you are working full time, and you are pregnant, at lunch time, you can consider going to your car and taking a nap, in order to feel energized throughout the rest of the day.

4. Diet

Your food intake is very crucial to your pregnancy.

You want to make sure you are eating nutritional food for your growing baby. You do not want to eat for two! that is an idea that you have to remove from your head. That is  how you are going to gain so much weight.

  • Dates: I would start my day with a date. Dates are very high in nutrients, contains good sugars, fills your appetite, provides energy, and will shorten labour time.
  • Nuts: I would always have a bag of nuts in my bag, incase I wanted to snack on something. Nuts include a source of healthy fats and will provide energy.
  • Oats: Every morning for my breakfast, I would eat oats, that I would turn into porridge. It will fill your appetite and give you energy for the rest of the day. Even now, during breastfeeding, it is advised to have oats.
  • Things to avoid eating are: Raw foods, including sushi, and caffeine.

I personally did not have any cravings during my pregnancy, but if you feel as though, you are craving something specific, I believe you should have it! Just stay mindful of your diet and try to keep your meals as balanced as possible.

5. Water & Red Raspberry Leaf Tea

Make sure you drinks lots of water, around 2-3 liters, should be sufficient. It seems like a large amount but do try, as it is the best medicine for you and the baby.

I was also drinking red raspberry leaf tea during my pregnancy. My midwife mentioned that it can strengthen the uterus, shorten labour time, and help in milk production during breast feeding.

6. Exercise

If you do not like going to the gym, like me, you will have to end up deciding what you like to do instead. You can try your hand at yoga, pilates, or walking. Try to avoid heavy lifting and stay active, as much as possible. I, personally, love walking. I walk my dogs and I walk with my husband. During my pregnancy, I would walk around 5k’s everyday, monitoring my progress on my phone.

7. Fashion advice & Hair tie trick

 If you are pregnant, I am sure at one point, you opened your closet, thinking that nothing will fit you and you have nothing to wear. What I did was , clear out my closet early on and basically, segment the things that I was able to wear later, and brought out the clothes that were actually stretchable, usually, the clothes that tend to be elastic.

Girls, elastic is your new best friend during pregnancy!

I, personally, chose not to shop at any maternity clothing store, and went into stores that I would usually walk into, buying things that I know even if I did not wear them after my pregnancy, it would be alright.

There is a trick that I found out, that can save you money and make your pants fit better and be more comfortable. This trick is not just for pregnant women but also those who have gained a little bit of weight. It is the hair tie trick , where you put it through your button hole, on your pants, and attach it to the button. It will hold your pants in place and make it more stretchable (demonstrated in the video).

 

8. Preventing stretch marks

 What you want to do in order to prevent stretch marks, or reduce the chances, is to moisturize constantly. Ideally,  you do not want, just the top layer of our skin to be moistened, but the skin cells beneath, towards the bottom layer of the skin, to be moisturized.

 In order to receive that thorough moisturization, I opted for using avacado oil, which is the most absorbing and deeply moisturizing oil, mixed with Rosehip oil, Almond oil, Vitamin E oil, and shea butter. Shea butter was my favorite, because it absorbed so well into my skin, and stayed on throughout the day. Thankfully, this concoction worked and I did not get any stretch marks.

9. Body clock changes

During your pregnancy, you will be waking up in the middle of the night. It is your body’s way of preparing you for the journey ahead and for all the amount of times you will be waking up, for feeds. If you cannot manage to fall back asleep, manage your time wisely, and read up on all the tips and tricks you need for your pregnancy. It is never enough!

10. Pictures

                       

 I made my husband take a photo of me, every single weekend. I found a dress, that I chose to wear from the very beginning , which I knew was stretchable and would carry me through the end of my pregnancy. I took pictures from my first trimester up until my last, and the final photo that I will be taking is with baby Yasmine! I suggest you take time out of your day, for a photoshoot, and really embrace your pregnant body.

11. Mindset

 It is crucial to be thankful and grateful through your journey. I felt incredibly blessed, as many people, unfortunately, do not get the opportunity to get pregnant. I was incredibly happy that I was pregnant, despite the morning sickness, and if you look at it from the perspective of ‘’ this is such a miracle’’,  I think that is when you are going to wake up, feel positive, and decide to have a great day.

12. Music

I listened to a lot of music during my pregnancy. It is called music therapy, and it will help you feel positive, daily. Try and incorporate various genres of music. My favorite is definitely music from the 80’s and 90’s. I can guarantee by doing this, it will increase the positivity in your life!

13. Monitor your weight

I put on around 8 kg during my pregnancy. With the placenta and fluids, it was around 6-7 kg’s, so when I lost everything during childbirth, I was able to recover to my original weight, fairly quickly. However, in my opinion, the most important matter here, is the health and wellbeing of your child. In a heartbeat, I would put additional kg’s, if it was needed for my baby to be healthy. That should be the biggest priority for any mother, as it was for me.

14. Prenatal classes

I recommend going through prenatal classes. Being a first time mother, these classes helped me and my husband, learn things that we would have not learnt otherwise.   

Personally, we opted for private classes, as it was more comfortable. Our midwife, Julie, from babies and beyond, was amazing. She helped us, get prepped for the labour day, by introducing music therapy, visualization techniques, breathing techniques, and much more.

15. Business as usual

I know some people tend to quit their jobs, once they find out that they are pregnant. I always wonder why! Unless your job puts you and the baby in jeopardy, you should be able to continue to work, as it will help stimulate you, help your mindset, prevent stressful thoughts about what is happening inside your body,  and keep you active.

16. Travel

Travel as much as you can, for as long as you can, till you no longer can!

There is a term called Babymoon, where you and your husband go away, like a honeymoon, before the baby arrives. You will not get a lot of alone time, once the baby has arrived, so enjoy your time with your spouse, and for yourself, as much as you can!

17. Get organized

Organizing things during the early stages, will help with your stress levels. Having tasks, such as your nursery being ready, should be done as soon as possible, as that will remove a lot of burden off your shoulders. If you can, have your hospital bag ready and packed, in order for you to have an ease of mind. Incase you fall into labour sooner than expected, in that moment, you know all you need to do is chuck the bag in the back seat of your car, and you are ready to go!

18. Prioritize you

Just enjoy the experience!

Enjoy the moment, as it is only going to happen once, for that particular baby. I remember my favorite time was when my husband willingly bent down, to tie my shoes for me , and when going into an elevator, everyone would give way to the pregnant lady! Enjoy the special treatments, while it lasts, because you will definitely miss it! So enjoy this particular time, and most importantly, prioritize you!

I hope all the tips have been useful and you can take away just one, and implement it, into your pregnancy journey.

I know you are going to be tested, there will be certainly tough times, and maybe even a few tears! Just remember the outcome, when you hold your baby in your arms. It is going to be so worthwhile, and you will forget all about your challenges that you are facing, and the ones that are coming your way!

Ways of Overcoming Anger Instantaneously

Anger is an emotion that everyone possesses but I like to believe that it’s only the weak that hold onto it.  Anger is nothing but destructive and negative and it can be very toxic to you and your mental health once you let it manifest.  Anger is the one emotion that brings out the worst in us, makes us say and do certain things that isn’t in our character some of which take a moment but we would regret for life.

Learn to control anger before it controls you through these 4 steps:

1. Breathing Techniques

Your breathing has a huge calming effect on your body.

Whenever a certain uncomfortable emotion arises, our breathing becomes altered and it can aggravate the situation even further.  I understand that it can be difficult to find a calm retreat in the middle of your rage, however it helps to visualize and to imagine yourself in a different place in order to calm your body’s heart rate down.

Breathing Exercises shows us some helpful tips on how to breathe once you feel yourself getting angry, stressed or frustrated:

1) Right now, or whenever fear or anger occur immediately force an exhale. Do not “gear up” by taking an in-breath, just force an exhale now.

Continue the exhale until you can not exhale any more air and then let a deep effortless in-breath come in. Repeat this again, please.

2) Right now, or whenever fear or anger occur immediately force an exhale. Do not “gear up” by taking an in-breath, just force an exhale now.

Continue the exhale until you can not exhale any more air and then let a deep effortless in-breath come in. Repeat this again, please.

3) Right now, or whenever fear or anger occur immediately force an exhale. Do not “gear up” by taking an in-breath, just force an exhale now.

2. Surrender

When I say surrender I mean everything that’s holding you back from calming down and letting the stress go.  This could be your ego even if you don’t call yourself an egoistic person, you might not realize that it’s actually getting the best of you.

Surrender your need to be right.

Even if you are, you don’t need to prove that to anyone else, just keep it between you and yourself and let go of your need to prove something to someone.

Surrender the blame game.

It doesn’t matter who did it and it’s not going to diffuse or help the situation any better, either. Let go of the finger pointing.

Surrender the need to be spiteful and vengeful because this is toxic to your own health at the end of the day.

Letting your anger completely control you to the breaking point of wanting to hurt someone else or get even is going to do more damage to you than to anyone else.

3. Laughter and Smiling

Similarly to what I said about breathing techniques, laughing and smiling could be hard to do in a situation where you’re becoming angry and getting frustrated. However, scientific research comes to show that once you smile (even if it’s forced), it releases positive ‘happy’ chemicals in your brain.

Let’s give it a shot right now and show me that big smile of yours.

According to NBC News, Dr. Gupta who is a neurologist from IGEA Brain and Spine explains,

A smile spurs a chemical reaction in the brain, releasing certain hormones including dopamine and serotonin. Dopamine increases our feelings of happiness. Serotonin release is associated with reduced stress. Low levels of serotonin are associated with depression and aggression. Low levels of dopamine are also associated with depression.

In other words, smiling can essentially trick your brain into believing that you’re happy when you’re actually not and it can spur the actual feelings of happiness.

Although you may look a bit psychotic trying to crack a smile while you’re angry, faking it till you make it seems like it’s worth a shot!

4. Face the Problem

For the sake of closure, try tackling the problem that’s making you angry in the first place.  Address it head-on and seek an understanding of why then articulate the reasons for why something made you as angry as it did.

Do things that will help you move forward instead of staying where you are, drowning in your anger, the closer you are to a resolution or a solution, the faster you can set yourself free from any anger that’s been holding you hostage.

Look for the ending of what made you angry whether it was something significant or once important to you if that helps you move past your anger.

Conclusion

Although being anger and feeling rage or hatred is normal, it’s extremely toxic towards our body and our soul. It can even go as far as affecting our health and put us in a situation where we are at a greater risk for heart disease.

A lot of us can go through life not even realizing, understanding or acknowledging our anger triggers and it can cause us to take a lot of irrational actions and decisions.

If you’re someone who focuses on the betterment of yourself and your future self-development, you owe it to yourself to work on how you can maintain your anger and set yourself free from one of the most toxic emotions ever known to man.

5 Reasons Why People With Amazing Ideas Fail

Ever had that ‘aha!’ moment when a light bulb just goes off in your head?

I’m sure every single one of us at one point in our lives or another has come up with great ideas that can actually change the world and impact it in a way that makes it better. Whether it’s a new app, a new business idea or even a new product or service, whatever our goal is.  Many thinkers in philosophy have regarded an idea as a ‘fundamental ontological category of being’.

Everything great once started with an idea.  An idea is what has essentially built empires, societies, beliefs and even goes as far as dictating how we function in our everyday lives.

If executed the right way, ideas can lead to impeccable innovations.

1. They Don’t Have Persistence

 

I believe that every single one of us has a purpose in our lives in this world. It’s just up to us to find out what that purpose is and to persist until we make that impact.  A lot of people have amazing ideas but without the right execution, they can never come to life.  One thing I’ve learned in life is that anything is possible once you persist and it’s definitely something that is easier said than done.

Unfortunately, a lot of people create doubts in their heads and stop believing in their intention.  One of the main causes for this is because many lack persistence.  Persistence is the ability to embrace whatever shortfalls you might have in the future as lessons and keep going, learning and growing.

Think about it, have you ever had an idea but because it didn’t work out and you faced a lot of difficulties you either got distracted or just simply let it go because you thought it would never work?

When something isn’t working out in the time that you imagined it to be doesn’t mean that it’s impossible or that it’s a bad idea – it simply means that you are being faced with challenges that will push you in the right direction and equip you with more knowledge and experiences to get closer to your end goal.

In order to have persistence, you must be open to failure and I’ll even go as far as to say embrace it as a positive indicator of being shifted into the right direction rather than a sign that it’s time to throw in the towel.

2. They’re Trying to Solve the Wrong Problem

 

Having a great idea is a good start – but it’s not enough.  Sometimes, you need to go back to the drawing board and take a look at things from a bigger perspective.  Let’s take Instagram for example, I know a lot of people who can criticize what’s wrong with it and how they need to add X, Y and Z features to make it better.

Although that’s all well and good, and you’re probably right – it’s not the same for everyone.  Instagram got famous because it’s easy to use and understand and that targets a larger user audience than if they started incorporating other complicated fancy features – ironically enough, that’s their competitive edge.

It’s important to grasp the fact that the larger your target audience is for your idea, the more successful it will be.  Always focus on how you can make the impact bigger rather than getting absorbed in perfecting each and every little detail so make sure you’re solving the right problem by making it feasible, beneficial and practical.

3. They Have Poor Execution

It’s great that you’re passionate about something and you truly believe in it.  Don’t forget that after the creative fun part of an idea is formed, the equally important part of how to practically execute it comes into play.

If you don’t know what you’re doing or lack any guidance in this department, chances are your idea probably won’t be that successful.

You need to have someone that can help you execute your idea and guide you in a better direction because having a lack of expertise can lead to some serious consequences.  Falling through the cracks can be easy and much of the gap between expectation and performance is all due to failure of executing strategy effectively.

Think about the best appropriate way to bring your idea to life in its best light – don’t be a victim of another poorly launched idea.

4. They Underestimate the Power of Marketing

Everything you do is marketing and marketing is truly the heart of any business, organization or idea.  I strongly believe that marketing plays a huge role in the success of any idea and a lot of people unfortunately underestimate the importance of effective marketing.

Let’s think about this for a second and say you have an exceptional product called product ‘A’ and you have a mediocre product called product ‘B’.

If you see everyone buying product B, sharing pictures and videos of product B and even talking about product B you’re more likely to buy product B than product A – even though product A could be better by a landslide.

Many of you won’t necessarily agree with this, but I wrote an article on what everyone can learn from Kim Kardashian.  Now, whether you love her or hate her, she is a marketing genius.  Whether you follow her or not, you can’t escape all the news and publicity about her.  And just when you think you forgot about her for a second, she pops up again!

Read related: 6 Business Lessons We Can All Learn from Kim Kardashian-West

Marketing creates demand, influences behavior, creates wants and needs that were maybe not even there to begin with!

5. They Have Wrong Timing

You need to make sure that your idea is appropriate to the time that we live in.  There have been numerous startups and businesses that failed because they were just too ahead of their time.  A great example of this is what was called a ‘Chind?gu’; a term coined by Japanese inventor Kenji Kawakami to describe useless gadgets.  In a book called, ‘101 Useless Japanese Inventions: The Art of Chind?gu’ in 1995, Kawakami described the selfie stick as a “useless invention” which later on went to gain global popularity in the 21st century.

It goes to show that not all ideas are bad or completely impractical, some are just ahead of its time and it goes to show that if it doesn’t make an impact on your target audience, it can fail quite miserably.  Although you can have a great idea, executing it at the wrong time can lead to its downfall.

Timing isn’t just about launching it either this quarter or the next, it’s much broader than that.  It’s about being able to analyze the condition of the industry, audience or gap you’re targeting as a whole and as a culture.

Conclusion:

Ideas are something worth spreading and exploring because there’s always a trigger to why you thought of them in the first place. However, it’s important to be able to understand that once you’ve thought of something, it’s not just rosy fields and sunshine from then onwards, it comes down to real dedication, hard work, persistence and calculated decision-making skills.

Lastly, don’t forget that many brilliant and well-known philosophers, scientists and innovators that we think of as visionaries were actually scoffed at and worse, called liars. Some examples of this are Gregor Mendel and Nikola Tesla. Always remember that it’s your responsibility to do justice by yourself and commit to turning your idea into a reality to leave your mark and impact in this world.

Do These 6 Things to Make Sure Your Resume Gets Read

On average, every job opening in the corporate industry attracts around 250 resumes.  Only 4 to 6 candidates are called into an interview and only 1 is offered the job.

Seems pretty intimidating, doesn’t it?

It is.

That’s also why it’s extremely important that your resume portrays you in the right light otherwise you might not get the opportunity at all.

Let’s check out some statistics mentioned in an article on Undercover Recruiter:

Recruiters spend an average of 3.14 minutes reading a candidate’s resume and they have generally made up their mind within the first minute.

1 in 5 recruiters will actually reject a candidate before they’ve even finished reading their resume.

5% of applicants are dishonest when describing their previous roles or the time they spent in a job.

10% of job seekers have applied for 50 or more jobs without hearing back.

Sounds like some pretty intimidating stuff, right?

Buckle up because I’m going to show you 5 important and essential tips to make sure your resume gets read:

1. Use Correct Grammar

Oh, for the love of grammar!

Some people are going to go ahead and think that this is a no-brainer but trust me, it isn’t! When I want to recruit, you’d be shocked at the amount of people who submit their resumes without even double-checking their grammar.

Did you know that according to UR,

59% of recruiters will reject a candidate because of poor grammar or a spelling error. Though these mistakes seem small, they indicate that the candidate is sloppy and hasn’t taken the time to proofread their resume.

And I can’t agree with them more!

Before a company can ever even call you in for an interview, you failed to make a good first impression on paper.  That’s already a pretty big indicator to them about the kind of employee you could be. Present yourself on your resume as the same way you would in person.

Make sure you use proper language and correct grammar because there’s no excuse for handing in a sloppy resume to any potential recruiter from any respectable company that you want to work for.

Moreover, nowadays where we’re all exposed to the Internet and Google, there’s no excuse even if the language your resume is in isn’t even your first language.

2. Keep the Visuals Professional

Presentation counts. Yes, it’s important that your resume is attractive but only if it’s executed in the right way. Keep it professional and avoid ‘snazzy’ out of the ordinary decorations and colors.

44% of recruiters get put off from a resume because of the use of distracting borders and backgrounds.

42% of recruiters get put off from a resume because of the use of inappropriate or unnecessary clipart and emojis.

31% of recruiters get put off from a resume because of inappropriate use of fonts.

Imagine what would happen if you had all of the 3 big no-no’s on your resume but in reality you are the perfect candidate for the job. You wouldn’t be given a second chance just because of the lack of professionalism!

Yes, visuals can help, but make sure it’s within the professional criteria, for example, use all black colored fonts, capitalize at the beginning of sentences and for pronouns and use bullet points to keep the layout easily readable and consistent!

3. Avoid Clichés

Ever heard something so many times to the point where you find yourself rolling your eyes?

Trust me when I say this, whether a recruiter is reading resumes or an interviewer is asking you questions, they’ve probably heard a lot of people say the same things many times before.

Avoid saying clichés that make you sound unoriginal and no offense – boring.

According to Undercover Recruiter, some phrases that put recruiters off are:

‘I can work independently.’ – Most people can!

‘I’m a hard worker.’ – Yes, aren’t we all?

‘I work well under pressure.’ – Congratulations you tough cookie!

I mean, that’s all great but isn’t everyone?

Think about what sets you apart from the crowd and mention the things about yourself that a lot of people don’t have so that you’re not just another paper in the pile.

4. Tailor Your Resume

Make sure you tailor your resume to the position you’re applying for. According to Entrepreneur,

41% of HR managers look for whether or not the resume was customized to the open position or not.

Tailoring your resume doesn’t mean you’re going to change it up altogether, it just means you need to make adjustments to make it relevant.  The reason for this is because, as mentioned before, ‘1 in 5 recruiters will reject a candidate before they’ve even finished reading their resume’ so you want to grab their attention and make it relevant as soon as they lay their eyes on the first sentence.

Secondly, focus on the content. This means actually understand the job that you’re applying for and make appropriate changes to your bullet points about relevant information on there. For example, if you are applying for a managerial position, it would be important to mention more points on how you’ve thrived in leadership positions before and make sure you make it the first section of your resume.

5. Keep it One Page

Eliminate all the fluff.

Recruiters don’t have time to go through really long resumes, and it’s one of the things that actually puts them off and make them want to stop reading.  Your resume should be short, concise, to the point and relevant in all aspects.

If you have too much information going on it can also confuse them, and once you’ve confused them, they don’t make a choice so you’ve pretty much lost them.

Other ways through which you can make your resume more appealing, short and concise is through eliminating the use of unnecessarily big words, run-on sentences and random jargons because it can set hiring managers off more than impressing them.

Keep to the point – especially with an average of 250 resumes coming in for one open position, nobody wants to waste time.

6. Replace Your Objective with a Pitch

Don’t forget that when you’re sending out your resume, you’re marketing yourself.  A great way to catch the recruiter’s attention is through replacing your opening statement or objective with an elevator pitch!

It’s understandable that condensing your entire work history into a few short words (no longer than 25 to 50 words) can be difficult and challenging to say the least.  One of the ways to get around it is to make sure you have the right information. I always mention that whenever you’re addressing an audience, even if it’s on paper, you need to make sure you have three important factors covered, so ask yourself,

Is it educational?

Is it inspiring?

Is it entertaining?

Creating the right balance with each of these elements is what’s going to make you stand out from the crowd.

Seek gives a great example of an opening statement that leaves a lasting impression:

I’m a self-motivated, creative copywriter with five years of marketing and advertising experience, specializing in digital content with a keen interest in social media.

By making it short, precise and to the point, you ensure that you leave them intrigued by making a lasting first impression.

Sample CV

 

Download Sample CV

Conclusion:

Writing resumes is never easy, but no matter what level you’re in the industry or where you’re applying for your next career advancement, always remember that you’re trying to market and sell yourself.  You can be sure that you’d make a great fit for the company and the team but others don’t.

You owe it to yourself to make sure you have an above-average resume that’s going to ensure that you get called in for that interview.

Once you’ve made it through the door and you’re on to the next step, read my other article on ‘How to Ace an Interview’.

How to Spot a Liar

Isn’t that like being psychic?  Wouldn’t it be interesting and probably even helpful to know whether someone’s lying to us or not?  Is it even possible?  So many questions and so little answers!  According to Pamela Meyer, author of ‘Lie Spotting’,

Lie spotters are armed with scientific ways to spot deception.

It’s indeed an interesting subject. Although sometimes it can be easy to spot when a person is lying to you, other times, you won’t even notice that someone’s lied to you.

Here are 6 scientific ways through which you can spot a liar:

1. Listen More, Speak Less

Research suggests that liars tend to speak more than people who are telling the truth because they want to sound legitimate.  Liars tend to be generous when it comes to sharing details, which shows that they’ve probably put a lot of thought, effort and rehearsal into what they’re going to say.

On the contrary, honest people tend to give more direct and ‘to-the-point’ answers, usually because they don’t have to think about they’re going to say since they’re telling facts.

Aside from over-sharing of information, pay attention to the way that they speak.  An indicator of stress is when someone talks louder or faster.

A change in the natural tone of voice and repetitive clearing of the throat and coughing are all signs of deception.

2. Repetition of Questions

 

Another great indicator of if someone’s lying to you is when they stall by repeating a question you just asked, for example:

Did you take out the trash?

Did I take out the trash? Yes, I did.

I’m sure we’ve all done that when getting caught doing something wrong by our parents.  Everyone has a different reaction to getting caught lying, some get nervous and some try different ways to stall questions in order to give the ‘right’ answer.

Plus, usually when someone stalls a question, it’s either because they’re thinking about it or they don’t want to tell you.  And if they don’t want to tell you, you can probably guess that they’ll lie.

3. Contradictions

 

This is a pretty obvious way to tell if someone’s lying to you.

Look for contradictions in their story – see if something adds up or not.  When you’re listening closely, and paying attention to details of what they’re saying, it’s pretty hard to miss contradictions.  Liars don’t tend to have fool-proof stories, so if the story doesn’t add up, it’s most probably not true.

In terms of body language, a usually slow-talker could be talking really fast.  Someone who’s usually very animated while talking is now just sitting still looking around.

This isn’t to say that you should go looking for trouble, maybe they are telling the truth but ask them about the contradiction and their response and body language can you’ll be able to pretty much tell.  Try not to be intimidating when you ask either because that can cause them to get nervous which doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re lying.

4. A Smile Can Tell All

 

A lot of people can’t fake a smile or any or body language because it just happens unconsciously.

Interestingly, according the Psychology Today,

Smiles are used extensively by experienced liars because they both make others feel positive and also tend to be less suspicious about them lying.

It’s like a mask that people can use to cover up any negative feelings they might be having about lying and many fall for it.

Moreover, another reason why a smile is a great way to check if someone’s lying or not is to watch their face.

If the ends of their mouths reach the their eyes, if they squint or other indicators like crows feet, you can probably consider them telling the truth.

However, if they smile and nothing else in their face moves, then there’s a big probability that they’re lying to you.

5. The Word ‘No’

Pay attention to the way they say the word ‘no’, it’s a key word to observe if you suspect that someone’s lying to you.

For example, they could say ‘no’ and look in a different direction, hesitate beforehand, stretch the word out, close their eyes or change the tone of their voice.

This can also be used beyond just the word ‘no’, for example, if you ask a liar a direct question and they show body language of stalling (as mentioned in the previous point) which could be looking around, or trying really hard to think, you can probably assume that it’s because they’re lying.

Be the best judge of the situation!  You’ll be able to tell given the context or circumstance.

6. They Can’t Tell a Story Backwards

 

People who lie tend to add certain details to a story, which makes it harder for them to remember.  Those extra details often don’t add up, either.  If you have a feeling that someone’s lying to you, ask him or her to retell the story backwards.

You’ll notice that if someone’s lying, they’ll potentially simplify the story to avoid contradicting themselves even more.

When it’s difficult to recall details of a story that never happened and especially when they’re caught off-guard by it and don’t have the time to be able to rehearse.  Here you can look for other signs mentioned above that could show that they’re stalling or smiling and such.

Sometimes, it can be pretty obvious.

Conclusion,

Lying and being lied to is pretty common and happens on a daily basis.  Can you remember the last time you lied?  You probably can’t recall, but it’s actually been a lot recent than you’d think.  According to an article by the Independent, they claim that research shows that in just a span of 10 minutes, the average person will tell at least 3 white lies!  There’s always ways to tell if someone can be lying to you or not, but these aren’t set-in-stone.  They’re just indicators to help you identify if someone’s potentially lying to you.  At the end of the day, there’s no ‘real’ way to read someone’s mind—and that’s the truth.

What Not to Say in an Interview

It’s totally normal to get nervous before an interview.  You never know what’s going to happen, what you’re going to be asked or how to prep for it.  Worse case scenario, your nerves get the best of you even though you know you’re fit for the job.

So, let me help you secure that opportunity by putting your best foot forward and understanding these 9 mistakes you should never make in an interview:

1. Anything Unprofessional

I mean, that’s a no brainer, right?

Wrong.

Common sense isn’t common practice and for that exact reason, let’s just get this one straight out the way.

Once, I had someone ask me where I get my hair styled from and what color I dye it, while I was interviewing them.  Another time, a candidate applied for an administrative role and kept on talking about how much she loves public speaking and how she wants to become a public speaker.

It’s important to keep focus for why you’re here because it’s a reflection on your character and a foreshadowing of how you can hold and carry yourself in the workplace and how productive of an employee you can be.

Keep to the point and remind yourself of all the great qualities you possess that would make you a perfect fit for this job!  You have to present your best foot forward, show them what you’re made of and why they would hire you.  One of the ways in which you can stay being professional, is to prepare so you can be more confident.

Keep from saying things like, ‘Sorry, I need to take this call‘, ‘Sorry I’m late!‘ (DON’T BE LATE) and ‘How long will this take?

I’ll answer those questions for you so we can get them out the way now.

Firstly, using your phone in the middle of an interview is highly unprofessional and there are a shockingly large number of candidates who actually think its OK to use their phones.

Secondly, it doesn’t matter if a half an hour interview turns into a one and a half-hour interview. Sometimes, if it’s running longer, it’s usually a good sign.

Lastly, just don’t be late.  The ideal is 15 minutes before your interview time is scheduled for.

2. Asking What the Company Does

When people ask me this question, it’s a no for me, straight off the bat.

It shows that you didn’t put in any time or interest before coming in to find out what the company you could be  working for does.  Neither does it show the interviewer that you’re prepared or if you even care about this opportunity at all.

Make sure to research the company that you would potentially like to work at before you head over to the interview.  Nowadays, we have social media and almost every company has a website, the resources are at your fingertips – it just takes a couple of seconds to pull the information up on your screen.

Otherwise, other than it reflecting on your lack of initiative, it just wastes the interviewer’s time.  No one wants to sit there repeating themselves about the company for each and every candidate.

Do yourself a favor, and do your research!

3. “It’s On My Resume”

The interviewer is aware of that it’s on your resume.  They’ve seen your resume.

Always be prepared to say something more beyond just a written word because your communication and social skills are most likely going to be evaluated to see whether or not you could be face-to-face with a client or not.

Usually when they ask you questions on things that are already on your resume, they’re trying to see your articulation skills or to go into more detail about that specific role/experience.

So, next time, instead of answering a question with an ‘I don’t know’, seize this moment to talk about yourself and express what a great communicator you could be and show how well-spoken you really are!

4. Don’t Jump the Gun

 

When you express questions related to what’s in it for you, this can give the impression that you’re not really passionate about getting the job that can look really unappealing and arrogant.  The interviewers want to know what you bring to the table.  Talking about your demands too early on can be highly damaging to your chances of even getting your foot in the door.

Some questions that can throw interviewers off are, ‘So what’s my salary?’ or ‘What kind of benefits will I get?’ – that all just makes sound like you’re only there to take rather than give.  Any job-role is a two-way street and in order for you to be able to considered for a position, avoid coming across as self-serving.

This might also show the interviewer that you’re in it for the wrong reasons – and they steer clear of employees who show any of those signs.

Now, no one’s saying that you don’t have a right to ask all of these questions, but there’s a time for it. Wait till you get a second interview or job offer to discuss these topics.

5. “I Don’t Know”

 

Points for being honest but it’s the wrong direction.

It’s always good to be transparent with an interviewer and show a bit of character while holding a professional stance, but just replying to a question with an ‘I don’t know’, just may give off the impression that you’re incompetent and think on your feet.

Trust me, sometimes, interviewers are going to throw questions your way that they know are difficult just to challenge you.

If you really don’t know how to answer the question, the way you present yourself on how you tackle that situation give off a good impression that you have potential to be practical in real-life situations that may require you to think fast.

So, instead of saying, ‘I don’t know’, you could say something like ‘you know what, that’s a great question, let me think about that!’

6. Anything Negative About Your Old Company or Boss

This is a big no-go-zone for a lot of reasons.

Firstly, it’s going to reflect badly upon you – not anyone else.  If someone you just met comes up to you and starts telling you all their life problems, you’re not going to feel bad for them, you’re going to be so put off to the point where you’re going to see them in a bad light, even if what they’re saying is true.

If anything, it sounds like you’re complaining and trying to get pity.

Are you going to say negative things about this company if they hire you?

Are you going to say negative things about your new boss?

All these things matter and speak highly on your character.  Not only that, but it might even make them think that maybe you’re the one with the issue and not the other way around.  No one wants to hire a troublemaker.  Besides, even if that is the case and your old company or boss was horrible to you, you should still have discretion towards them if ever brought up in topic.

Ultimately,

There’s not hard and set rule on how to prepare for an interview, but preparation is key.  Get to know the job that you’re applying for beyond just reading it and frame your responses according to that.

Secondly, get to know the company you’ll be working for as well as you can and build a strong foundation on everything you should know.

Check out their social media to get a better vibe of who they are and what they do.  Lastly, sell yourself! This is the best chance to talk about all your strengths and what makes you special for their company and always have a list of questions that you would like to ask them.

Read my other recent article on how to ace a job interview here.

7 Things a Woman Must Have When She Makes It

Setting materialism aside, I think owning things that symbolizes our accomplishments in life and our hard-earned money is something worth doing. The fact that you know you deserve them and that it gives you great “pleasure”, making you forget all those pressures at work, frustrations with clients, killer deadlines, and sleepless nights.

Check out these 7 things that I believe every successful woman should have. Whether you’ve made or haven’t made it yet, use this list as your aspiration to keep going and getting the things you deserve.

1. The Iconic Chanel Jacket

 

Four real pockets, silk lining, and a delicate chain to ensure that it falls perfectly, the Chanel jacket is undeniably iconic.

A timeless classic worn year after year, it is without a doubt one of fashion’s most revolutionary pieces. It never goes out of style – you can reinterpret and reinvent it in a thousand ways: with skirt suit, tulle dress, or even jeans! The versatility of this jacket is beyond impressive. As how Karl Lagerfeld put it, “Some things never go out of fashion in the world of fashion: jeans, the white shirt, and the Chanel jacket.”

Price tag: From $10,000

2. Quality watch

 

Wearing a quality timepiece has been associated with sign of success or status.

It becomes a wearable trophy, a daily reminder that says ‘I can do this’ –  Kevin gray of The Wall Street Journal.

By quality watch, I’m not just referring to timepieces marketed by fashion labels; I’m talking about watches that were made by serious watchmakers, such as Patek Philippe, Audemars Piguet, Rolex, and Piaget.

These are considered investment-grade pieces – not to mention, a probable vintage collector’s edition in 20 or 30 years’ time with a very significant value when they go to auction.

Did you know that the Patek Philippe 1518 wristwatch was sold at auction for $11,136,642 and is now the world’s most expensive watch?

Price tag: $11,000 – $48,000 (Patek Philippe)

3. Diamond Tennis Bracelet

 

This is an iconic piece of jewelry that every accomplished woman can have.

Popularized by tennis superstar Chris Evert in the 1980s, the diamond tennis bracelet is such a fine piece of jewelry and a very classic accessory that enhances your sophisticated look. Dress up or dress down – they look great with just about any outfit, even with a daily wear.

This bracelet also signifies your journey to success. It’s one of those pieces that can grow with you as you achieve something – you can start with smaller diamonds then, as your budget allows, you can gradually upgrade to bigger diamonds as your success grows. Now, my recommendation when it comes to upgrading/trading your jewelry is to buy it from a jeweler and build a relationship with that jeweler so it would be easier for you to trade your pieces.

The diamond tennis bracelet is also a sentimental piece that can be passed down. I wore my diamond tennis bracelet on my wedding and it’s something that I’ll definitely pass on to my daughter.

Price tag: $5,000 dollars – $100,000 (depending on the size of the diamonds)

4. Birkin and Kelly Bags

 

These “it” bags are literally about “the effort of earning it” – because even though you have the money, you can’t just get your hands on it. They’re rarely sold to anybody. And these bags don’t care if you’re “somebody” – you can be on the waiting list for years.

Is it arrogant?

Yes.

Is it obnoxious?

Yes.

Do we still want it? Hell, yes!

The world’s most coveted carryalls became popular because of the unique stories of the women behind them.  In 1981, designer Jean-Louis Dumas was sitting next to actress Jane Birkin on a plane and realized she was struggling to keep all her belongings in her straw bag.  Birkin admitted she couldn’t find a leather bag she liked – and so, Dumas took that simple remark as an inspiration and the “Birkin Bag” came to life. In 1956, actress Grace Kelly gave Robert Dumas’ Sac à dépêches Hermes travel bag a new association after the paparazzi photographed her using the bag to shield her pregnant belly.

From that moment, the bag became known as the “Kelly Bag”.

Both the Birkin and Kelly bags are considered status symbols and great investments.  Here are some quality fun facts: the average Birkin takes 48 hours to make and is completely handmade by one artisan; while the average Kelly takes 18 to 24 hours to make and is completely handmade by one artisan.

Now, how many Birkin and Kelly do you want – that’s all up to you? But, having one is a must.

Price tag: $ 379,000 (Himalaya Birkin)

5. Investment Property

 

The question of why you should invest in real estate has a very simple answer: it assures good financial returns that only appreciate as time passes.  Other benefits of property investments include:

  • Maximizing your tax return
  • Appreciation of your asset values
  • Capitalization of the physical assets
  • Positive cash flow
  • Using leverage to maximize asset value

It’s a smart business move and at the end of the day, there are many benefits of investing in real estate that definitely outweighs the costs and it makes you earn a steady flow of income.  Because of the never-ending inflation, nowadays, it’s sometimes not enough to just rely on one income coming in.  When you invest, you don’t leave all your eggs in one basket, essentially you’re spreading them around.

With the right investment, you can enjoy the added advantage of diversifying your investment portfolio.  Not only that, it also makes you feel pride in your ownership!

Price tag: $300,000 (decent studio apartment in the UAE)

Read related:

5 Things The New Rich Are Investing In – And It’s Not What You Expect

The Top 7 Investments for 2018

6. Buy Your Own Home

 

Owning a property should be one of your top priorities.  It’s all about securing your future, retirement, and saving in the long run.  And above anything else, isn’t it comforting when you can call a place your own?

Some other advantages of owning your own home include more privacy, they typically appreciate in value, provide a home for your future family and build equity.  When you own your own home, the costs are pretty predictable too and it’s definitely more stable than renting.

Last but not least, it makes you feel proud.

Price tag: $3,000,000 (decent family villa in the UAE)

7. Bank Account

 

A successful woman has savings.  She knows she needs a backup plan.  She knows that sometimes unexpected things happen that could possibly leave her without an income for a period of time, or an emergency could come up which could require a big outlay on her behalf.  A bank account doesn’t just allow you security, it allows these savings need to be easily accessible in case of an emergency.

Whatever the circumstance, a successful woman is prepared.

Price tag: there’s not price tag to this – it should be healthy enough to allow you to take a year off or retire early

What other things should successful women must have? Let me know by commenting below.

8 Things Men Look for in a Woman

Whether you’re getting to know someone, are in a relationship or have been married for 50 years, men are truly simple creatures and what they look for in their women is pretty straightforward.

I’m a proud feminist so when I say women tend to over complicate things; I’m not taking any sides, I’m just speaking my truth.

Here are 8 things most strong men look for in a woman and surprise surprise, it’s not a 20-something-year-old with platinum blonde hair.

1. Intelligence

Beauty may be dangerous but intelligence is lethal.

Popular claims like ‘men prefer women who are not as smart as them’ get confused in translation.  For one, let’s address the fact that there is more than just one type of intelligence.  Intelligence doesn’t only come in the form of ‘book-smarts’, your career or how many degrees you have.  Intelligence can be found in the way you communicate, make decisions and handle situations.

If you’re a successful researcher in a field of science or have many advanced degrees – that’s great for you! This doesn’t mean you overload your partner with ‘matter-of-fact’ information or conversations because this can actually be counterproductive and ultimately, a turn-off.  It can come across as you thinking you’re better than him.

Intelligence is always attractive and it’s without a doubt extremely important.  There’s always a way to show your partner that you’re intelligent and have him appreciate it, genuinely.

When men look for what they want in a woman for a long-term relationship, they look for someone who they can hold a conversation and exchange ideas with.  You can show your intelligence through, for example, having opinions and stands on what’s going on in the world, making perfectly rational choices when it comes to cross-roads and being able to think for yourself.

So don’t think twice about reading your books and continuously gaining more knowledge – life is about constant self-development – just avoid coming across as a ‘know-it-all’.

Since she’s smarter than me, the only way we resolve anything is by arm wrestling. That is my only chance of winning anything with her because if it’s an intellectual battle, I would lose. She’s the smart one in the family. – George Clooney on Amal Alamuddin

2. Mystery

Men being men, love the chase and the mystery that comes with it.

This is also human psychology.

The less you know, the more curious you’ll get.

Men love to ‘decode’ and read women and once interested, other women in comparison seem plain and ordinary.

If you reveal too much about yourself in the first couple of meetings, what’s left for him to find out?

According to Psychology Today, it’s common knowledge that ‘people like people who like them. This is one of the most replicated findings in all of social psychology. But people also like people who might like them. This is one of the most well known principles of seduction.’

Since men love to chase, mysterious women become a challenge and it gives them a ‘kick’ out of it.  The unpredictability is extremely exciting to some.  Women who only reveal a little bit of themselves at a time are the ones who can keep them interested longer.

However, there’s a balance that needs to accompany the mysterious act.  If you go too far, it can make him feel unsafe around you and emotionally disconnected.

Always remember that everything in moderation blossoms.

The essence of romance is uncertainty. – Oscar Wilde

3. Respect

 

A person who is nice to you, but is rude to the waiter – is not a nice person.

Respect comes in a lot of different ways.

The way you talk and carry yourself, the things you do, the way you treat others is all a reflection of the amount of respect you have for yourself and others.

If you use foul language commonly, throw temper tantrums on the littlest things and lack consideration for other people’s feelings – you won’t be considered very mature and therefore, not get much respect.

Moreover, men look for women who they find pride in when introducing them to their friends and family. If you’re not a respectful woman, he probably won’t be too willing to go through with that idea.

Establish your boundaries, your values and the kind of woman you aspire to be and he will respect you for it.

 4. Affection

 

The most desired gift of love is not diamonds, roses or chocolates.

It’s focused attention.

Men aren’t as in tune with their emotions as much as women and that’s one of the reasons why they crave an affectionate, emotional connection with the woman they’re with.

Men love being nurtured and given attention to. For them, this is a sign of femininity and makes them feel more masculine.

By being positive and uplifting, you’re creating a loving space that men truly appreciate more than you’d think.

Surprisingly, according to an article in the Daily Mail, more than 1,000 couples who had been together for an average of 25 years were questioned by scientists for the sake of the study.  Results showed that frequent kissing or cuddling predicted happiness in the relationship for men more than women.

Doing things that show you care like simple hugs, kind words and appreciation are surprisingly underrated. Men are simple – just like anyone else who would need attention and care!

While I was singing and dancing and playing piano and having one of the best experiences I’ve ever had on a film, my lady was raising our daughter, pregnant with our second, and trying to help her brother fight his battle with cancer. If she hadn’t taken all that on so I could have this experience, it would surely be someone else up here. Sweetheart, thank you. – Ryan Gosling on Eva Mendes

 5. Ambition

 

There is no force more powerful than a woman determined to rise.

Contrary to popular belief, ambition attracts ambition.  It’s unfortunate how many women believe that men don’t appreciate or want successful, intelligent or ambitious women.

This couldn’t be further from the truth.

From a psychological viewpoint, we’re more drawn towards people who resemble us and who we want to be. When a man is around an ambitious woman, it would make him want to be a better version of himself, too.  This can motivate him and make him see you as a positive influence in his life. Energy – whatever form – is surprisingly contagious and there’s no relationship better than when two people better each other.

Again, similar to men liking intelligent women, there’s a balance that comes with being able to be ambitious and vulnerable depending on the situation.  An ambitious woman recognizes when and where it’s required and is still able to put her guard down towards her partner because too much of something can come across as aggressive and overwhelming.

I’ve got to say, I always found it great if she was making all kinds of money. I didn’t feel threatened by it at all. – Barack Obama on Michelle Obama

 6. Confidence

Confidence is the ability to feel beautiful without needing someone to tell you and if you can’t love and appreciate yourself – no one else will.

A lot of women deny compliments from their partners, insist on their negatives, don’t take care of themselves, lack self-esteem and continuously compare.

All of these factors don’t contribute towards anything except towards the destruction of a relationship.

Negativity and a lack of self-confidence can become extremely toxic for someone that’s around you often

There’s always someone who’s going to be better looking and smarter than you. Not being able to accept that can cause insecurities to play on the mind. This results in jealousy, anger, self-hate, demotivation and irritability to yourself and others around you.

Sometimes, women don’t even realize that they’re doing it.

For example, if your husband pays you a compliment that you look amazing in that dress and you reply with,

No you’re lying, I gained too much weight.’

you’re actually demotivating him from paying you any compliments at all the next time. When your negativity clouds you, it leaves others around you feeling frustrated and unheard.

Practice self-love through whatever means suits you best.

Whether it’s going to a self-development class, going to the spa, getting your nails or hair done or even going out shopping for a new outfit.

Take charge of your life to build your self-confidence and love towards yourself. You can never depend on others for your happiness.

It’s not a turnoff, but it’s upsetting to me when a woman has lost her confidence. I genuinely think that all women are beautiful in a different way. We live in such a critical world, and for women the bar has been set high, but they should really just grab that bar and snap it. It doesn’t mean anything. – Alex Pettyfer

 7. Humility

I truly believe that no relationship can work without humility.

There’s never one person who’s always ‘right’ and the other ‘wrong’.

I’ll even go a step further and say that having humility is also a form of confidence.

It shows that you’re accepting of being able to make mistakes and are willing to learn from them.

If anything, men love women who have humility.  It even brings out respect for the person and it allows the man to feel like he has been heard.

Not being able to admit when you’re wrong is actually a sign of weakness and not strength.  Furthermore, if you’re always ‘right’ whenever there’s a discussion, it plays on the man’s confidence because they’re always put down if something goes wrong.

Lack of humility is unfortunately very common when it comes to the way women are in relationships.

Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less. – C.S. Lewis

8. Friendly and Sociable

 

Don’t wait for people to be friendly – show them how.

Be the type of person you’d want to meet.

Men love women who know how to be friendly and social for whenever they go out together.  Be open to new people, get ready to talk and connect and be yourself instead of just sitting there attached to his arm.  Being friendly is also important because no man wants to be with a woman who he has to worry about giving attitude to his friends or family.

If you’re antisocial and not very talkative, it won’t give a very good impression and people are less likely to even want to be around you.

A study conducted in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that men were attracted to women who are nice and sweet.

Through experiments which monitored sexual interest and participants’ feeling on potentially long-term dating, calling it ‘responsiveness’. it further found that men who perceived female partners as nice and friendly found them to be “more feminine and more attractive”.

Past studies conducted suggests that this is due to friendliness and niceness being associated with higher estrogen levels.

A man wants to be proud to call you his partner when he sees that you’re able to make new friends and welcome them with warmth – they find hospitable women more feminine and attractive.

This also shows that you’re a team player towards him and that you have the ability to be family oriented.

Conclusion:

Men get commonly labeled as superficial at times because of the way their brains are wired – for example, that they care a lot about the way a woman looks and that they’re less emotionally attached as women, etcetera.

However, as mentioned before, men are surprisingly very simple people and what they truly look for in women is actually beyond just that.

There are many other factors that actually attract a good man, such as personality, dressing style, the way someone carries themselves, the feminine attitude and all the additional factors mentioned above are simple examples of what most strong men look for in women.

What do you guys think?

5 Surprising Morning Routines of Successful Women

I know what it feels like when you’re trying to get an early morning but you can’t seem to break away from your bed’s gravitational pull.

What’s different between our mornings and successful people’s mornings?

The way you choose to start your day can set the tone for the rest of it According to psychology journals, morning people are more proactive and that having a regular morning routine can actually reduce stress and anxiety.

Here are surprising morning routines of successful women:

1. Exercise

 

I know the last thing on your mind as soon as you wake up would be to pull yourself out of bed, put on a pair of leggings and sports bra and start working out.

Research by University of Pittsburgh Medical Center claim that while some people feel extremely tired and slow when waking up, exercising can get you feeling more energetic because it gets your heart pumping faster.

Other benefits include giving your metabolism a big boost, a surge of dopamine that gets you in a better mood and the overall feeling of accomplishment.

Some examples of successful women that start their morning off by exercising are Michelle Obama (she wakes up as early as 4:30a.m!), Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez and Oprah!

2. Pursue Your Hobbies

 

Waking up early to make time for doing what you love can definitely boost your day.  Whether it’s a dance class, painting, practicing an instrument or a sport you play for fun.

Hobbies are actually a really good way to motivate you to get out of bed for someone who finds it hard to.

You’re definitely going to be more responsive to the alarm when you know you’re getting up to do something you love rather than rushing to go straight to work.  Hobbies can also help put you in a relaxing, peaceful mood and unwind rather than be in that ‘rush, rush, rush!’ state.

It helps you get re-centered and can also get your creative juices flowing!

A great example of a successful woman who kick starts her day by doing what she loves is Anna Wintour.

Yes, she’s the editor-in-chief for Vogue magazine but she also loves playing tennis.

Wintour starts her mornings off with a game at 5:45 in the morning before work!

3. Meditate

 

Maybe all the proactive activities don’t really work for you.  Not everyone’s a morning person – and I get that.

There’s other ways to set the tone for your day too, and one of the best ways is through meditation. When you wake up, take a few moments to structure your thinking.

You’d be surprised to know the life-altering effects meditation can have.

Some benefits include having a peace of mind, inducing determination and motivation for the day, organization, increased awareness and counteract stress.

Meditation definitely works for Arianna Huffington, co-founder and editor-in-chief of the Huffington Post.

SoulCycle Corporate interviewed Huffington about her success and asked about her daily meditation and ways to de-stress:

It begins the night before, with a good night’s sleep — which, for me, means 7 to 8 hours. And a big part of my morning ritual is about what I don’t do: when I wake up, I don’t start the day by looking at my smartphone. Instead, once I’m awake, I take a minute to breathe deeply, be grateful, and set my intention for the day. I also practice yoga most mornings. And I breathe! The connection that conscious breathing gives me is something I can return to hundreds of times during the day in an instant. A conscious focus on breathing helps me introduce pauses into my daily life, brings me back into the moment, and helps me transcend upsets and setbacks.

4. Dedicate Time to Loved Ones

 

In such a fast-paced world, we tend to be guilty of neglecting the ones dearest to our hearts at times.

There are a lot of things to do throughout the day and sometimes, there’s not much time.

This is another reason to rise early and spend time with your family and loved ones before you set off to conquer the day.

Spending just an hour having breakfast together and touching-base with each other can build a stronger connection.

Whether it’s your parents, your children, your husband or your wife, everyone should take time out to dedicate a part of the day towards close ones.

Take Gwyneth Paltrow as an example,

I wake up at 7 am, I get [the kids] fed, and I get them dressed in their uniforms, any bits of homework are finished. I take them to school. She [Apple] gets dropped off at 8:25 am, and he [Moses] gets dropped off at 8:45 am, so we have a croissant together in his school dining room and we do reading together. Then I go home and I work for one hour on all the emails that come in overnight from LA.

5. Eat the Frog

 

That doesn’t sound too appetizing. What ‘eat the frog’ actually means is that,

If the first thing you do each morning is to eat a live frog, you can go through the day with the satisfaction of knowing that that is probably the worst thing that is going to happen to you all day long. – Mark Twain

Still don’t get it?

The philosophy essentially implies that when you get the most important tasks of the day out of the way.  This way you can get it out of the way as soon as possible and avoid procrastination.

If you can’t eat the frog, you can always go for the tadpoles first to build momentum.

Gloria Steinhem who is a NYC-based feminist icon manages to take the most important tasks head-on.

Steinhem claims that she usually “wakes up in a panic” because her whole life is pretty much organized around events and deadlines.

Her day starts off catching up with news in the bathroom, breakfast, heading off to get her morning latte and dealing with appointments and meetings for the rest of the day.

Conclusion:

Some of us don’t realize how important mornings truly are.

It’s okay if you don’t have a set routine yet, morning routines are different for everyone and can take a couple of trials to perfect.

You just have to find what’s the best way for you to wake up and be most efficient.

Successful people, in general, all manage to find the time for their family, passion, health and themselves throughout their day.

It’s just about how willing you are to organize your mornings in order to get the best out of yourself.

I guess it’s time to start setting your alarm an hour early.