7 Things a Woman Must Have When She Makes It

Setting materialism aside, I think owning things that symbolizes our accomplishments in life and our hard-earned money is something worth doing. The fact that you know you deserve them and that it gives you great “pleasure”, making you forget all those pressures at work, frustrations with clients, killer deadlines, and sleepless nights.

Check out these 7 things that I believe every successful woman should have. Whether you’ve made or haven’t made it yet, use this list as your aspiration to keep going and getting the things you deserve.

1. The Iconic Chanel Jacket

 

Four real pockets, silk lining, and a delicate chain to ensure that it falls perfectly, the Chanel jacket is undeniably iconic.

A timeless classic worn year after year, it is without a doubt one of fashion’s most revolutionary pieces. It never goes out of style – you can reinterpret and reinvent it in a thousand ways: with skirt suit, tulle dress, or even jeans! The versatility of this jacket is beyond impressive. As how Karl Lagerfeld put it, “Some things never go out of fashion in the world of fashion: jeans, the white shirt, and the Chanel jacket.”

Price tag: From $10,000

2. Quality watch

 

Wearing a quality timepiece has been associated with sign of success or status.

It becomes a wearable trophy, a daily reminder that says ‘I can do this’ –  Kevin gray of The Wall Street Journal.

By quality watch, I’m not just referring to timepieces marketed by fashion labels; I’m talking about watches that were made by serious watchmakers, such as Patek Philippe, Audemars Piguet, Rolex, and Piaget.

These are considered investment-grade pieces – not to mention, a probable vintage collector’s edition in 20 or 30 years’ time with a very significant value when they go to auction.

Did you know that the Patek Philippe 1518 wristwatch was sold at auction for $11,136,642 and is now the world’s most expensive watch?

Price tag: $11,000 – $48,000 (Patek Philippe)

3. Diamond Tennis Bracelet

 

This is an iconic piece of jewelry that every accomplished woman can have.

Popularized by tennis superstar Chris Evert in the 1980s, the diamond tennis bracelet is such a fine piece of jewelry and a very classic accessory that enhances your sophisticated look. Dress up or dress down – they look great with just about any outfit, even with a daily wear.

This bracelet also signifies your journey to success. It’s one of those pieces that can grow with you as you achieve something – you can start with smaller diamonds then, as your budget allows, you can gradually upgrade to bigger diamonds as your success grows. Now, my recommendation when it comes to upgrading/trading your jewelry is to buy it from a jeweler and build a relationship with that jeweler so it would be easier for you to trade your pieces.

The diamond tennis bracelet is also a sentimental piece that can be passed down. I wore my diamond tennis bracelet on my wedding and it’s something that I’ll definitely pass on to my daughter.

Price tag: $5,000 dollars – $100,000 (depending on the size of the diamonds)

4. Birkin and Kelly Bags

 

These “it” bags are literally about “the effort of earning it” – because even though you have the money, you can’t just get your hands on it. They’re rarely sold to anybody. And these bags don’t care if you’re “somebody” – you can be on the waiting list for years.

Is it arrogant?

Yes.

Is it obnoxious?

Yes.

Do we still want it? Hell, yes!

The world’s most coveted carryalls became popular because of the unique stories of the women behind them.  In 1981, designer Jean-Louis Dumas was sitting next to actress Jane Birkin on a plane and realized she was struggling to keep all her belongings in her straw bag.  Birkin admitted she couldn’t find a leather bag she liked – and so, Dumas took that simple remark as an inspiration and the “Birkin Bag” came to life. In 1956, actress Grace Kelly gave Robert Dumas’ Sac à dépêches Hermes travel bag a new association after the paparazzi photographed her using the bag to shield her pregnant belly.

From that moment, the bag became known as the “Kelly Bag”.

Both the Birkin and Kelly bags are considered status symbols and great investments.  Here are some quality fun facts: the average Birkin takes 48 hours to make and is completely handmade by one artisan; while the average Kelly takes 18 to 24 hours to make and is completely handmade by one artisan.

Now, how many Birkin and Kelly do you want – that’s all up to you? But, having one is a must.

Price tag: $ 379,000 (Himalaya Birkin)

5. Investment Property

 

The question of why you should invest in real estate has a very simple answer: it assures good financial returns that only appreciate as time passes.  Other benefits of property investments include:

  • Maximizing your tax return
  • Appreciation of your asset values
  • Capitalization of the physical assets
  • Positive cash flow
  • Using leverage to maximize asset value

It’s a smart business move and at the end of the day, there are many benefits of investing in real estate that definitely outweighs the costs and it makes you earn a steady flow of income.  Because of the never-ending inflation, nowadays, it’s sometimes not enough to just rely on one income coming in.  When you invest, you don’t leave all your eggs in one basket, essentially you’re spreading them around.

With the right investment, you can enjoy the added advantage of diversifying your investment portfolio.  Not only that, it also makes you feel pride in your ownership!

Price tag: $300,000 (decent studio apartment in the UAE)

Read related:

5 Things The New Rich Are Investing In – And It’s Not What You Expect

The Top 7 Investments for 2018

6. Buy Your Own Home

 

Owning a property should be one of your top priorities.  It’s all about securing your future, retirement, and saving in the long run.  And above anything else, isn’t it comforting when you can call a place your own?

Some other advantages of owning your own home include more privacy, they typically appreciate in value, provide a home for your future family and build equity.  When you own your own home, the costs are pretty predictable too and it’s definitely more stable than renting.

Last but not least, it makes you feel proud.

Price tag: $3,000,000 (decent family villa in the UAE)

7. Bank Account

 

A successful woman has savings.  She knows she needs a backup plan.  She knows that sometimes unexpected things happen that could possibly leave her without an income for a period of time, or an emergency could come up which could require a big outlay on her behalf.  A bank account doesn’t just allow you security, it allows these savings need to be easily accessible in case of an emergency.

Whatever the circumstance, a successful woman is prepared.

Price tag: there’s not price tag to this – it should be healthy enough to allow you to take a year off or retire early

What other things should successful women must have? Let me know by commenting below.

5 Surprising Morning Routines of Successful Women

I know what it feels like when you’re trying to get an early morning but you can’t seem to break away from your bed’s gravitational pull.

What’s different between our mornings and successful people’s mornings?

The way you choose to start your day can set the tone for the rest of it According to psychology journals, morning people are more proactive and that having a regular morning routine can actually reduce stress and anxiety.

Here are surprising morning routines of successful women:

1. Exercise

 

I know the last thing on your mind as soon as you wake up would be to pull yourself out of bed, put on a pair of leggings and sports bra and start working out.

Research by University of Pittsburgh Medical Center claim that while some people feel extremely tired and slow when waking up, exercising can get you feeling more energetic because it gets your heart pumping faster.

Other benefits include giving your metabolism a big boost, a surge of dopamine that gets you in a better mood and the overall feeling of accomplishment.

Some examples of successful women that start their morning off by exercising are Michelle Obama (she wakes up as early as 4:30a.m!), Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez and Oprah!

2. Pursue Your Hobbies

 

Waking up early to make time for doing what you love can definitely boost your day.  Whether it’s a dance class, painting, practicing an instrument or a sport you play for fun.

Hobbies are actually a really good way to motivate you to get out of bed for someone who finds it hard to.

You’re definitely going to be more responsive to the alarm when you know you’re getting up to do something you love rather than rushing to go straight to work.  Hobbies can also help put you in a relaxing, peaceful mood and unwind rather than be in that ‘rush, rush, rush!’ state.

It helps you get re-centered and can also get your creative juices flowing!

A great example of a successful woman who kick starts her day by doing what she loves is Anna Wintour.

Yes, she’s the editor-in-chief for Vogue magazine but she also loves playing tennis.

Wintour starts her mornings off with a game at 5:45 in the morning before work!

3. Meditate

 

Maybe all the proactive activities don’t really work for you.  Not everyone’s a morning person – and I get that.

There’s other ways to set the tone for your day too, and one of the best ways is through meditation. When you wake up, take a few moments to structure your thinking.

You’d be surprised to know the life-altering effects meditation can have.

Some benefits include having a peace of mind, inducing determination and motivation for the day, organization, increased awareness and counteract stress.

Meditation definitely works for Arianna Huffington, co-founder and editor-in-chief of the Huffington Post.

SoulCycle Corporate interviewed Huffington about her success and asked about her daily meditation and ways to de-stress:

It begins the night before, with a good night’s sleep — which, for me, means 7 to 8 hours. And a big part of my morning ritual is about what I don’t do: when I wake up, I don’t start the day by looking at my smartphone. Instead, once I’m awake, I take a minute to breathe deeply, be grateful, and set my intention for the day. I also practice yoga most mornings. And I breathe! The connection that conscious breathing gives me is something I can return to hundreds of times during the day in an instant. A conscious focus on breathing helps me introduce pauses into my daily life, brings me back into the moment, and helps me transcend upsets and setbacks.

4. Dedicate Time to Loved Ones

 

In such a fast-paced world, we tend to be guilty of neglecting the ones dearest to our hearts at times.

There are a lot of things to do throughout the day and sometimes, there’s not much time.

This is another reason to rise early and spend time with your family and loved ones before you set off to conquer the day.

Spending just an hour having breakfast together and touching-base with each other can build a stronger connection.

Whether it’s your parents, your children, your husband or your wife, everyone should take time out to dedicate a part of the day towards close ones.

Take Gwyneth Paltrow as an example,

I wake up at 7 am, I get [the kids] fed, and I get them dressed in their uniforms, any bits of homework are finished. I take them to school. She [Apple] gets dropped off at 8:25 am, and he [Moses] gets dropped off at 8:45 am, so we have a croissant together in his school dining room and we do reading together. Then I go home and I work for one hour on all the emails that come in overnight from LA.

5. Eat the Frog

 

That doesn’t sound too appetizing. What ‘eat the frog’ actually means is that,

If the first thing you do each morning is to eat a live frog, you can go through the day with the satisfaction of knowing that that is probably the worst thing that is going to happen to you all day long. – Mark Twain

Still don’t get it?

The philosophy essentially implies that when you get the most important tasks of the day out of the way.  This way you can get it out of the way as soon as possible and avoid procrastination.

If you can’t eat the frog, you can always go for the tadpoles first to build momentum.

Gloria Steinhem who is a NYC-based feminist icon manages to take the most important tasks head-on.

Steinhem claims that she usually “wakes up in a panic” because her whole life is pretty much organized around events and deadlines.

Her day starts off catching up with news in the bathroom, breakfast, heading off to get her morning latte and dealing with appointments and meetings for the rest of the day.

Conclusion:

Some of us don’t realize how important mornings truly are.

It’s okay if you don’t have a set routine yet, morning routines are different for everyone and can take a couple of trials to perfect.

You just have to find what’s the best way for you to wake up and be most efficient.

Successful people, in general, all manage to find the time for their family, passion, health and themselves throughout their day.

It’s just about how willing you are to organize your mornings in order to get the best out of yourself.

I guess it’s time to start setting your alarm an hour early.

Ways You Can Handle Stress Like a Superstar

Before we start talking about the ways in which you can handle stress, let’s debunk one myth as reported by the Stress Management Society, that

“Stress is not necessarily a ‘bad’ thing.  Without this brilliant ability to feel stress, humankind wouldn’t have survived.”

Although I agree with them, maybe there could’ve been a better substitute for the word ‘brilliant’ because sometimes, stress can turn you into a walking, talking train wreck.

Stress is a combination of things, psychological pressures mixed with your body’s physical response to it and too much of it can have a very unhealthy effect on your body and your mental state.

Here are 5 ways in which you can handle stress like a superstar!

1. Identify the Source

There could be many different reasons for why people get stressed out and it’s usually situational.  Sometimes, stress can be temporary but other times, it can be something that’s been going on for a long time.  You need to watch out for major stressors because they can have a huge negative impact on your health overtime.  It helps a lot to be conscious of why certain things make you feel the way they do – and more than half the power to change that is in the awareness itself.  Think about if it’s your boss, your workplace or maybe toxic relationships that are holding you back.

Once you have identified what is causing you to become stressed, you can then go in with the intention of fixing it.  Knowledge truly is power and then you can decide what you want to do to tackle it and change it around.

2. Take Control!

Sometimes you have to live by Nike’s famous words, “Just Do It”.

Seriously, there’s no better way to deal with stress than to try and actively fix or at least help the situation at hand.  If it’s really bothering you and stressing you out, it’s definitely worth exploring your options on what you can do to take care of the situation and how you can make it better.  I’m not going to tell you to be reckless here, though.  If you do decide to go through with trying to find out how the problem can be better tackled, be level-headed, objective and more focused on the logical side of things.  For example, if you had a fallout with a friend, instead of going around being passive aggressive, try sitting them down and making sure that they understand your side of the story and also hear them out.

Identifying the problem and facing it head strong is sometimes one of the best things you could do.

3. Healthy Lifestyle

 

Having a healthy lifestyle helps a ton for when it comes to dealing with stress.

This includes eating properly throughout the day, laying off the junk food and actually taking time out to exercise!  The way you treat your body, your body treats you.  This is because the food you have can cause your body to react in ways that wouldn’t be ideal.  For example, if you drink tons of caffeine every morning, you’re more likely to heighten your anxiety.  Refined sugars, high sodium foods also tend to have the same effect.  If you’re someone that comfort eats, reconsider this as an option for stress reduction.

Be nice to it, and take care of yourself. In the long run, it’ll be worth it and you’re going to thank yourself.

4. Take a Break

Try to take a break from everything.

Learn that balance is important in life.  Some people take the edge of by working a lot but there’s a fair share of people who aren’t built this way.  If you’re not a workaholic and working too much just adds on to your stress, take time out to do the things that really help you de-stress.  Personally, one of the best ways for me to tackle stress is through traveling.  I love traveling and I find that getting away from the constant hustle and bustle of daily life every once in a while can truly change a lot around because it puts everything into perspective.

If you don’t really have the option to travel, try to take time off for your family and relationships.  Do things that you genuinely enjoy doing – recreation-wise.  Everyone is different in terms of what makes them unwind.  Some people get a massage, others take a couple of days off and some even need something as small as listening to music to change their mood around!

5. Acceptance for What Can’t Be Changed

 

Sometimes, certain things cannot necessarily be changed in life—and that’s okay.  One of the indicators of someone being a strong person is the ability to adapt to their environment and show resilience.  Life can be a lot of things, and difficult at times is definitely one of them.  Ultimately, no one’s perfect but it’s important to keep in mind that a good attitude and positive mind state can take you a long way, even for those times when you can’t necessarily control your situation.  Letting go of something that cannot be controlled is you started to accept the situation for what it is.  Essentially, this takes the power out from the situation and puts it back in your hands.

To Wrap it Up,

Handling stress is not something that’s easy and although there are many benefits to stress as a natural response in our bodies, too much can cause a lot of damage.  Throughout life, we all come across situations that really push our stress buttons and the pressure seems like it’s on!  Through these steps, you can start to learn the best way to manage your stress because at the end of the day, everyone handles stress differently.

Once you practice this enough, you’ll come to realize that it’s not as bad as what it might seem in our heads and that there is always a solution and a bigger picture.

Are Women Becoming More Masculine

Nowadays, women and men are becoming more similar to one another as time progresses.

There’s a much more of an equal relationship between the two genders today. Women, specifically, are starting to act and feel more like men.

There are obvious changes between women from 100 years ago to women in the present if we look at everything from a big picture.

Here are 5 undeniable signs that women are becoming more masculine in our current society:

1. Increased Presence in the Workforce

 

According to Center of American Progress, women take up almost half percentage of the workforce (with 47% being women and 53% being men).

If we take a step back and look at men and women’s evolutionary past, women were the ones who stayed home and gathered food while men went out to ‘hunt’ and because of this men adopted the role of the primary bread winner.

In the present, this trend is now almost reversing as even married women now participate in the paid workforce.

Beyond just the workforce, according to the Daily Mail in 2016,

The U.S. Army just approved their first 22 women to be,ground combat officers after new rules open all military jobs to women – including fighting on the front line.

Due to women’s increased participation in the workforce and in other areas which was male-dominated at first, it brings out ‘male’ attributes such as determination, ambition, motivation and the need to survive.

2. Increased Aggression

 

Aggression is a trait that contributes towards violent criminal behavior.  According to Forbes, there’s a drastic increase in the number of women in the past two decades’ war on drugs.

Currently, there are more than 1 million women behind bars in the U.S. and rising. Even more shockingly, prison population of women is actually growing faster than men.

Research in psychology shows that women have become more increasingly involved in committing violent crimes than in the past.

For example, now a lot of drug cartels are lead by women and is on the rise. Surprisingly, according to Psychology Today,

The proportion of women in the U.S. correctional system doubled between 1985 and 1988.

Testosterone is the main hormone that is on average linked to more physical aggression in many species and is now showing it in the modern woman.

3. Delayed Marriage and Increased Interest in Casual Relationships

 

Studies revealed that women are getting married at a later age today than they did in the past.

This goes to show that there could possibly be a loss in interest for when it comes to starting a family and having children as compared to before.

Advancements in science has also made it easier for women to pursue and be successful in their careers through technologies that help them freeze their eggs or other means of fertilization at a later age.

Statistics show that there’s a dramatic increase in the average age at which Americans first marry, from their early 20’s to their late 20’s in just 30 years.

Could this increase in the future?

4. Increase in Female Athletes

 

There are physiological reasons for why women haven’t competed in sports in the past as much as men.

That’s because women’s bodies are designed in a way where they need to work twice as hard as men in order to be as strong or exude the same results.

Sport was mainly associated with masculine behavior due to this, as well.

Also, the 2012 Olympic championships in London was the very first one in history where there were female athletes competing from each and every country involved.

In 2016, there were more women athletes competing in the Olympics in Rio than in any other Olympics, in history.  There has been a huge increase in the percentage of female athletes in the Olympics from 1900-2016 from 2.2% to 45%, respectively, according to Vox.

I think it’s time to stop using the term, ‘you throw like a girl’.

5. Increase in Single Parenthood

 

With an increase in the divorce rate and single parenthood coming into the picture, a lot of single mothers are under pressure to take care of her children, without a father.

According to The Atlantic,

Single parents have more than tripled as a share of American households since 1960. It’s a huge problem without an easy explanation.

That’s an alarmingly significant increase and change in just the last almost 6 decades (which is roughly an average person’s lifespan).

One of the reasons for why single motherhood makes women more masculine is because since they’re the primary bread-winners, it increases testosterone increasing strength, stamina and competitiveness.

Moreover, in cases where the father is not present, it means that she has to take the role of being both, gentle and nurturing as well as the role of a strong disciplinarian.

What Does It All Mean?

It shouldn’t go unnoticed that women portray masculine attributes in some societies more than others, especially the modern woman.

However, I believe that this doesn’t mean that women are incapable of being feminine.

It pretty much still means that majority of women still want a man to be able to take charge in the relationship so that she can relax and be more free in her femininity.

For example, when I used to work in finance, I had my hair tied up and on some days, I’d wear pant-suits, however, as soon as I’d be off from work, I’d let my hair down and change into a dress.

Femininity may not necessarily equal staying at home, being a housewife and baking cookies. It could be portrayed in the way you speak, the way you dress and the way you carry yourself.

A lot of women who are feminine by nature tend to lose that touch with themselves in order to be more successful in the workforce.

That’s understandable, as sometimes, you have to be assertive and have certain degree of professionalism, which is associated with ‘male’ qualities in order to be successful, for example, if you’re a manager and you have to be authoritative.

However, it’s possible to be conscious about when it’s required and when it’s not.  I’m sure you’re not required to be assertive and dominant like a manager when you’re at home with your husband or when you go out on a date.

Women can be empowered, independent, ambitious and successful while all the while being feminine.

What do you girls think? Leave me your thoughts.

This is Why You’re Addicted to Your Phone

Addiction? Me?

Yes, you.

You’ve got a smartphone, right?

And you probably never thought you would actually be addicted to it but think about when you get that surge of anxiety or that irresistible curiosity the longer you stay away from it.

The dictionary definition of addiction is: The compulsive physiological need for and use of a habit-forming substance characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal.

Can you go a day without it?

There are some pretty scary statistics out there about smartphone usage. According to the Daily Infographic:

The average person checks their cellphone 110 times a day.

12% of adults use their smartphones in the shower while 40% check their cellphones on the toilet.

56% of users check their smartphones before sleep and 75% check it after sleep.

61% sleep with their smartphones under their pillow or next to their bed.

77% of parents and teens have argued about smartphone usage.

26% of car accidents are caused by smartphone usage.

50% of people feel uneasy when they leave their smartphone at home and,

50% of teens admit they’re addicted to their smartphones.

Shocked yet?

According to Time, plenty of research has shown how smartphones have started affecting our relationships.

Although it can be argued that there are positive influences such as staying in touch with the ones you love, there’s also a darker side to it.  Nowadays, real-life relationships and interactions are dulled out when a person feels the need to check their phone and it can cause distractions that you won’t even notice are silently demolishing our relationships.

Here are 4 ways our smartphones affect our relationships:

1. It Creates a Lack of Communication

 

Compulsively carrying your phone around wherever you go can break down communication barriers even between the most devoted couples and friends.

Communication is often more on the phone than in person in some relationships as well. You might think for a second, but hey, isn’t that still communication?

The truth is that it takes you away from reality.

When was the last time you actually had a deep conversation with someone close to you?

Make it a habit to put your phone on silent or away when you’re spending time with your friends, family or spouse.  Communicate how to reach you in emergencies before hand.  In my group of friends, whenever we go out, we put all our phones on the table in front of us and on silent. The first person to grab their phone and use it ends up paying the bill.

This is just one example of the different ways through which you can re-train yourself to stop excessively using your smartphone.

Texting is a brilliant way to miscommunicate how you feel and misinterpret what other people mean.

2. It Creates a Lack of Mindfulness

 

You can’t  be alert and focused on your surroundings when you’re continuously distracted by the buzzing of your smartphone.  Whether or not you actually open the social media notification, reply to a text message or answer a phone call, you’re still going to be wondering who reached out to you and why.

We live in a world that runs on immediate gratification – we have become so used to living in a fast-paced society where we can get anything at the tips of our fingers that not checking our smartphones as soon as it alerts us requires re-training.

I’ve seen mothers sitting with their children distracted by their smartphones when their son/daughter is trying to interact with them.

It’s even become normal for us to pay a good amount of money to concerts or shows just to watch it through the screens of our phones.

How many special moments have you let pass by without giving them a second glance?

A lack of mindfulness can cost you a once-in-a-lifetime experience, so next time, try to put the phone away and actually indulge in the moment.

The best times are actually those that aren’t documented.

3. It Takes Us Away From Reality

 

On many occasions, the way we might interact online can actually start defining how we are in real life.  For example, ever heard someone say the word “LOL” out loud instead of actually laughing?  Real people in real bodies in real time are different than someone online.

The way we text and communicate online sometimes merges with our real-life selves which can be quite scary – because we lose touch with our social self.

Others also use it as a self-defense tool.  For example, the preference of having serious one-on-one conversations over the phone or through text just to avoid any uncomfortable confrontations in person is getting common.

This can deteriorate your confidence and people skills.

Some people aren’t really all what they post to be in real life as what they portray behind the screen.

Read my recent article on ‘Why You Can’t Believe Everything You See on Social Media’.

4. We Become Irresponsible with Our Words

 

As mentioned before, it’s easy to be anyone when you’re hiding behind the screen and because of this, we become careless when it comes to the way we talk in reality.

The Internet is a harsh place and sometimes people are quick to judge others and make inconsiderate bold statements.  That’s what happens when you expose your pictures and life to millions of people you don’t know and probably won’t ever meet in real life.

It definitely affects the way we see others in real life, as well. When you become so used to hiding behind social media and the screens of your devices we become immune to the realization that we’re actually dealing with human beings who have emotions the same as ours.

Each interaction has an influence and our smartphones have definitely lead us to becoming more irresponsible when it comes to the way we use our words.

Always think before you post.

Take a couple of seconds to reflect on what it is that you want to post and how it can potentially affect others as well as yourself, also refrain from posting or publishing content that could potentially damage yours or anyone else’s reputation.

Read my recent article on ‘The Biggest Risk Could Be You’.

Conclusion:

We live in the Digital Age where we are surrounded by global economies that rely heavily on technology to bring about convenience and efficiency into our lives.

We can have endless debates and discussions on how beneficial and important it is for our growth and society.

When used wisely, your smartphone can no doubt enhance your life but if not – let’s not deny the fact that it’s also growing into a dangerous addiction and affection our real life relationships.

6 Incredible Reasons You Need to Start Power Dressing

Every individual has a unique style and clothing is one of the biggest ways to express it.

The way we dress can influence their position or authority in the workplace.

Power dressing is a phenomenon that came about in the 1920s and started with the Chanel suit.

The suit was a representation of a turning point of the way women dressed as it had masculine elements in it that gave women an authoritative appearance in order to be accepted as equals in the professional world.

In other words – the way you dress can have a huge impact on the kind of message you want to send across.

Power dressing is extremely important with incredible positive influence that many look past.

Here are 6 solid reasons for why power dressing is an essential in the workplace:

1. You Make Your First Impression Count

 

According to research, you have around 7 seconds to make a first impression.

I know – crazy.

As soon as you walk in a room full of people you don’t know, they can make a judgment about you before you even get to say anything!

The time they spend after the first 7 seconds will be about validating that judgment. People have little to no control over first impressions because they are involuntarily driven by their subconscious to notice small details fast.

It’s up to you how you come across and whether or not you want to make that first impression count.

The way you dress and carry yourself will speak volumes about the kind of person you are and if whether or not others want to associate themselves with you.

Regardless of whatever job you’re entering – whether it’s entry level or CEO, you need to make an impact.

2. You Gain Respect

 

Notice what all people in power have in common: their way of dressing.

Whether it’s a celebrity, an influencer, a manager or a CEO, they all carry a unique style that shows their position of authority.

Power dressing can have a major impact on your career and as mentioned before, it allows people to see the best version of yourself.

In order to gain respect from your fellow colleagues or your audience, you need to ask yourself if what you’re wearing shows whether or not others can take you seriously.

Yes, there are exceptions – for example, how Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg or Bill Gates.

However, their success and achievements speaks for itself.  Be conscious of the way you want to present and portray yourself. Be weary of your surroundings and understand what you can and cannot get away with.

If you’re working in the corporate world, you should be avoiding anything low-cut or mini like the plague.

If you’re presenting, make sure you’re dressed in a way that is appropriate for the mass audience.  Always be conscious of your surroundings and who’s watching.

3. You’re Prepared

 

Dressing well at work keeps you prepared for any unexpected meetings or important people you may run into.  Imagined you’re dressed sloppy and that’s the day you get called in for an important meeting with your boss – it’s never a good impression.

The way you dress is important for your appearance and to keep up with.

You never know the opportunities that you might miss by putting an end to your chances before things even start.

Don’t get me wrong – being uncomfortable is important.  Wear clothes that you don’t have to keep on fixing every two minutes, that won’t distract you or that aren’t too tight in order to maintain being well dressed and comfortable at the same time.

Some ways to keep prepared is by bringing an extra pair of heels and keeping them at the office or having a blazer on stand-by.

4. If You Look Good, You Will Feel Good

It’s incredible how much influence the clothes we wear have on us. Ever heard the saying,“if you look good, you’ll feel good”?

Even though a lot of people don’t believe it to be true, research has come out and shown that the clothes we wear, do in fact have an effect on our confidence, mood, attitudes and overall social behavior – which defines your body language.

When you look the part, you’re more likely to be the part.

Just think about the difference in your confidence if you put on some sweats and a pajama top compared to if you wear a well-tailored work dress in a board meeting.

Yes – you’re still the same person, you can express the same ideas and have the same knowledge but you’re definitely going to feel more confident in the latter attire.

There has been a lot of scientific research that backs up this psychology, in one by Peluchette and Karl on ‘The Impact of Workplace Attire on Employee Self-Perceptions’; it was found that participants felt most trustworthy, competent and authoritative when wearing business attire.

5. You Break Stereotypes

 

A lot of women have reported that they don’t feel heard or taken seriously in the workplace. This is usually because of many factors.

Certain women still feel discriminated against in some fields of work. Power dressing is a way to break through the stereotypes and to let your voice be heard.

It shows that you’re there to be taken seriously and respected.

Although this doesn’t mean that everything will change overnight, but it’s definitely a step in the right direction.

6. You Express Your Personality

 

Today’s power dresser isn’t afraid to express their personality through their clothes!

Gone are the days where there was a formulaic way of dressing for the workplace – just because you’re dressed formal doesn’t mean it has to be boring.

The clothes you wear can always express your nature in a certain way – you just have to find what compliments you.

Wearing something that can give you a distinct look can actually work in your favor.  Everyone has a ‘trade-mark’ – and that’s what makes them special.

A little creativity doesn’t hurt and can help you stand out from the crowd and appear more as an individual.  Showing your individuality is also an expression of power when done right and subtly. You can do this with your earrings, heels, your handbag or accessories.

However, avoid going overboard because you don’t want to look too distracting.

To Bring it Together,

Every individual has a unique style and the way they power dress can influence their position or authority in the workplace.

Put in the effort and embrace power dressing whether it’s for a special meeting, a quick lunch with your coworkers or when going in for a new job interview.

How to Attract Your Dream Man

I’m no Matthew Hussey (dating coach)—but I do like to think of myself as some-what knowledgeable on certain aspects of dating and relationships. I’ve had to kiss my fair share of frogs before I found “the one”. Everyone’s dream man is different, but I’ve got experience under my belt of the basics of what to do and what not to do.

Sometimes your knight in shining armor turns out to be an idiot wrapped in tin foil – Unknown

1. Be Sure of Who You Are & What You Want

 

Honestly!

So many times, I’ve witnessed women settling in fear of losing someone.  I get it, being alone can be scary at first, plus the thought of cutting off the person you love seems heart-breaking.

Let me give you the cold hard truth:

If you, yourself don’t have standards for yourself then no one else is going to either.

Trust me, in the long run, you’re so much better off being single than being in a relationship based off negativity or toxicity.

Know what you deserve and don’t ever settle for anything less.

One way to manifest meeting your dream man, get a blank piece of paper out, write down (in detail) every attribute that you want in a man.

Be extremely honest, and write down the things you just aren’t willing to compromise on.  Keep note that your list can change over time because everyone evolves and not everything’s set in stone.

2. Establish Your Values

You’re most likely going to attract someone of the same nature as you, so try and establish who you would want to be as a person.  What kind of values do you want to abide by, the kind of people you want to surround yourself with and what your boundaries and standards are.

Once you’ve got that in-check, it would be easy to figure out if someone’s ‘the one‘ for you or not because it won’t be easy for you to get swayed the other way.

3. Balance

 

Learn to be a well-rounded person. Sounds simple, doesn’t it?

Unfortunately, a lot of people get too comfortable and sometimes, comfort is the enemy of growth.

For example, learn to have fun with yourself and be able to give yourself space and time.  Don’t be too clingy. I strongly believe that success equals balance.

Once you’re happy in all aspects of life whether it’s finances, work, friends or family, that’s when you can allow someone else to come into it to enjoy it with you.

Everything in moderation is key to being the best version of you, which would essentially attract the right person.

4. Understand That All Good Things Take Time, and Patience

 

Patience.

That word doesn’t fit well in today’s society where we tend to run after things that give them immediate gratification. Being in a relationship isn’t all butterflies and rainbows.

The grass may look greener on the other side at times, but that’s because some actually bother watering it. Learn to be someone who knows how to pick their battles and compromise where it’s worth it and communicate effectively with respect.

These things aren’t something that usually comes naturally, and when it does, it takes time and effort to maintain it.

So, before getting into anything it’s worth asking yourself if you’re truly ready for that kind of a commitment.

Furthermore, nowadays, statistics show that women are waiting longer to get married—so don’t be in a rush!

A news report in Virginia sponsored by the National Marriage Project called “Knot Yet” reports that,

One of the major demographic and social changes of the last four decades has been the dramatic increase in the average age at which Americans first marry, from their early 20’s in 1970 to their late 20s today. Delayed marriage in America has helped to bring the divorce rate down since 1980 and increased the economic fortunes of educated women.

Trust me on this, there’s more to life than rushing into marriage.

Yes—the idea may be dreamy, but marriage is difficult and getting used to being alone is very important.

Invest time into becoming a better you and just have patience! Plus, desperation isn’t attractive and trust me, it shows.

5. Looks Aren’t Everything, But They Matter

 

This doesn’t necessarily mean that everyone cares about looks, and beauty comes in different shapes, sizes, shades and personalities.

Men are known to be more visual than women, so it doesn’t hurt to enhance your appearance. Take care of yourself, put a little makeup once in a while, style your hair and try wearing something a little flirtier.

Appearance does make an impression, so why not check that box if you can!

6. Don’t Be Scared to Show Your Femininity!

 

It’s great to be a strong woman with a mind state that expresses independence.  I’ve noticed some women don’t like to show their vulnerable side out of fear that it would make them looks weak.

Tony Robinson talks about the law of attraction and power of polarity of masculine and feminine energy and claims,

The main law of attraction works like this: the more opposed the sexual energies between two people are – masculine vs. feminine energy – the stronger the attraction will be in the relationship

This is because if two people have a similar polarity, the attraction will be diminished.

In essence, don’t be scared to show off your femininity. A strong woman will always want to do things herself. However, a stronger woman knows she can do it herself, but accepts help anyway. Make the man feel like a man.

7. Smile!

 

It’s your best accessory.

You would be shocked to know that there are a surprising number of case studies and research dedicated to the psychology behind smiling! There’s a deep evolutionary connection with smiling.

For one, it portrays that you’re not a threat, that you’re carefree, outgoing, nice and approachable!

Read my recent article on the power of smiling here.

To Tie it Altogether

There’s no hidden ‘secret‘ to attracting your dream man.  Plus, life is something that’s so unexpected; you never know what’s around the corner.

Be the best version of yourself for when it does happen and don’t forget to have fun and enjoy the ride!

How to Make a Killer First Impression

Did you know that the moment you meet someone new, they’ve already made an impression about you?  It just takes one tenth of a second.  Everyone judges, consciously or subconsciously – it’s human nature and uncontrollable.  It’s just the way our minds work.

I’ll give you some time to take that in.

Done?

I’m sure you realized the extreme importance of making a lasting and killer first impression and I’m going to show you 5 of ways how:

1. Dress to Impress

Take the time to put in thought and effort into your dressing.  Make sure your clothes are ironed and clean because you think we don’t notice – but we do.  More so, be aware and appropriate of how you’re dressing and for what.  For example, if you’re going into a business meeting, don’t wear short skirts that rise above the knee or wear a shirt that could potentially be showing your cleavage.

It’s not a good look.

Be appropriate and conscious of the message you want to send out to your boss and coworkers.

The colors you have different psychological effects on how other people perceive you too.  For example wearing red expresses power, black represents formal and blue shows that you’re a team player.

Check out my article here on power dressing.

2. Show Confidence

This doesn’t mean be arrogant or egoistic because that can switch people off quicker than you think.

It means be confident in the sense where you’re comfortable in your skin.

Show other people that you’re not nervous and that you’re perfectly content with yourself in the current situation.  It makes you look more approachable and reliable as well, it exudes responsible traits and in return.

If you’re not a very confident person, being conscious of all these things will psychologically start making you actually feel it.

A great way to show confidence is through smiling. Smiling is welcoming, makes the other person feel comfortable and portrays you as someone who is trustworthy.

I’ve recently written an article on the power of a smile and it’s incredible the effects that it can have on someone.

3. Be Conscious About Your Body Language

Similarly to confidence, make sure you’re conscious of your body posture as it speaks for itself.  The way you walk and hold your back can show confidence and gives off an authoritative vibe to others.

One example of this is keeping your shoulders square when you’re talking to someone new which makes you look natural and relaxed.

Avoid fidgeting as it shows that you’re either nervous or intimidated which will subconsciously and naturally give the other person a feel of power over you.

Another important aspect to remember is to keep eye contact when you’re talking to someone.  Be conscious about if you’re focused on the other person and what they’re saying but at the same time don’t make it look like you’re staring.

Match your eye contact with your overall facial expression.

4. Have the Perfect Handshake

Your handshake can say it all.

A lot of people aren’t conscious about their handshake but it’s surprisingly important aspect of making a first impression.

You may think that because it’s subtle it has little effect but in reality and psychologically, having a firm handshake shows strong character and portrays strength enhancing positive feelings in the other person.

According to Dr. Douglas Fields in an article called ‘The Power of a Handshake’, non-verbal and physical touch allows our mind to tap into the other person’s mind,

This communication through touch and body language conveys vital information through a rich unconscious and universal language that transcends spoken language.

Take politicians as an example, they exude power and all their campaigns and meetings start and end with a strong handshake.

5. Be Culturally Aware

Let’s take it a step further. In our globalized world today, we have the privilege of meeting people from all around the world.  It’s important to educate ourselves in being aware of other people’s traditions and cultures.

First impressions can differ greatly based on who you’re meeting.  Furthermore, when you’re culturally aware, the other person highly appreciates the fact that you took the time to actually familiarize yourself with their traditions – and that leaves a great impression.

Some examples of this is how in the West, a strong handshake symbolizes strength and authority while in some African cultures, a weaker handshake expresses the same message.

Another example is of if you’re in an Islamic country where there different culture to the West, men have to be aware about not giving out their hand first and instead waiting for the woman to initiate as some cultures are more conservative.

Bringing It Altogether,

In essence, body language and gestures can easily tell a person a lot about someone’s character.  When you make a first impression, that sticks with the other person and for the time that they talk to you, subconsciously, they keep trying to justify why they made that first impression through the way you carry yourself in the conversation.

Being conscious about your body, your words and your thoughts while expressing confidence can help you greatly in making a killer first impression.

There are no second chances in making a first impression.

5 Ways Smart People Deal With Difficult People

We all face difficult people. While some come across them every now and again, the unlucky ones have to deal with them on a daily basis whether it’s in the workplace or at home. It can be pretty easy to lose your calm and cool because difficult people can be very challenging to deal with. At times, it can go as far as affecting our perfectly good day.

I’m going to share with you 5 effective ways on how to deal with ‘energy-drainers’.

1. Realize and Set Your Intention

 

Some people may argue that your intention doesn’t really matter as much as the outcome; however, in the big scheme of things our intentions really do matter because they color our actions.  Your intentions have a big influence on the way you act – consciously or subconsciously.

When dealing with a challenging person, stop and think to yourself about what your intention is towards them.

Is it to hurt them?

Is it to understand them?

Is it just to get the job done?

Your intentions are a great guide for your thoughts and actions and setting them can stop you from falling back into old patterns of reactions or negativity that you may have had.

Your intentions come out to be a great ‘guide’ for what you’re thinking and for how you want to act.  Once you’ve identified what kind of a response you want out of the person, it can also help you from falling back into times when you let your negativity or reactions get the better of you.

Once you pinpoint what your objective is, that’s when you can start trying different means to reach that end goal.  Depending on what it is that you’re trying to get out of them, you have to understand what makes them responsive.

2. Listen to What They Have to Say

 

A huge part of being a good communicator is knowing how to listen.

Sometimes when we’re so busy reacting, we forget to actually listen.  Once you start listening to understand instead of to just reply, you might realize that there’s a reason why they’re being the way they are.  It could be because they’re just going through a breakup, a personal family issue or even something to do with at work.

A lot of people don’t feel comfortable voicing their problems to others, and some don’t feel like they have anyone to talk to.  By putting yourself in a position of wanting to listen to what’s bothering them, you’re already helping out making the situation better.

Allowing them to share their thoughts and opinions on things can actually go a long way.  Be open to have them say their part and show a genuine interest in what they have to say through making eye contact and even going the extra mile to ask questions.

3. Pick Your Battles

 

Personally, I’d call this a skill because not a lot of people know how to do it.

Picking your battles means that not everything deserves your reaction.  Sometimes even when you think you’re right, it’s wiser to keep quiet because not all individuals who are difficult require confrontation about their behavior.

According to Psychology Today, there are two situations under which you have to make a decision on whether or not to get involved.

For example if you’re dealing with a co-worker that you don’t get along with but is a good team member, you should take the high road.  If you’re dealing with someone temporarily, it’s worth not getting involved because this person won’t have any power over you later.

4. Be Relatable

 

It may take trial and error, depending on person-to-person and the ‘degree of difficulty’, however, it’s certainly not impossible.  Everyone has a trigger point or something that just makes him or her ‘tick’.

Based on whom it is you’re dealing with, you should be able to have close idea on what’s going to make them respond.  For example, if it’s a boss, talk to them about all the progress you’re making before asking for something, if it’s a sibling, do something that they like and enjoy to get them in a better mood and so forth.

By being relatable, you’re creating a genuine connection between yourself and the other person and you bring out the other person’s want to connect with you, too.

It creates a common ground for people between each other and makes others feel like they’re not alone.  For example, have you ever felt like you were the only one but then felt a genuine connection towards someone who shared a similar experience or opinion?

That’s what I mean.

5. Set Consequences

 

The last resort is to set consequences for their actions.  Respond with your actions rather than trying to discuss and talk out your problems.  Being able to assert consequences for others’ actions requires a lot of confidence and patience.

Similar to what you do with children, setting consequences can be a necessary response to unacceptable behavior.  People are more likely to repeat the behavior if you don’t draw boundaries of respect.  Drawing boundaries and sticking to them will force the other person to abide if they still want to be around you.

Above all, don’t feel guilty for setting boundaries and consequences.  You may feel the other person trying ways to make you feel bad for what you’re doing, for example, by trying to emotionally blackmail you and play the victim card but focus on the end result and rise above how difficult it might potentially be.

To Wrap it Up

Like I said, everyone comes across difficult people in their lives at one point or another.  It’s inevitable and that’s why it’s important to understand how we can deal with them.  Some are obnoxious, some might make you feel bad about yourself and some might actually get in the way of your growth.

Whoever they are or however they are, there is one thing they all have in common – that they have to be addressed and dealt with.